


I was long ago someone strange

by AbbySomething



Series: Maybe This Will Be My Year [4]
Category: Samurai Jack (Cartoon)
Genre: (Not), Gen, abby continues to make references, as in they argue about stuff from the past, mature themes, yeaaaahhh this needed to happen at some point sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-31
Updated: 2016-08-31
Packaged: 2018-07-29 16:10:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,407
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7691086
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AbbySomething/pseuds/AbbySomething
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Time does not heal all wounds, but they can form the ghosts of scars.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I was long ago someone strange

The silence was both a blessing and a curse.

A blessing to Jack, as Aku had finally become silent. A curse to Aku, because now they only had their own thoughts to stew on. And that was one place he did not want to be right then.

Oh sure, he was used to scheming alone, but walking in silence next to someone he despised was taxing enough without being able to voice his complaints. Jack had made very clear he did not enjoy hearing Aku’s voice so much as utter a peep unless it were something incredibly vital.

Aku’s mind would not stop racing over the events of the last few weeks: the samurai fool, allowing Aku to travel by his side in exchange for “trying to understand morals” (bah!); their clash and hard-fought victory over the El Legarto gang ( _bah!_ ); and most especially Jack’s confounded insistence on repeating those defense lessons, while also constantly drilling Aku on human morals ( ** _baaaahh!_** ).

Questions like: finding a bag of money and what to do with it. The answer should have been obvious— keep it, dammit— but the fool insisted that the “right” thing to do was to first search for any indication of an owner on the bag, and if none were found then to go around and carefully ask residents in the area about the bag without revealing its contents.

Stupid samurai! That wasted so much time; at the _very_ least, Aku should have had the option of simply leaving it there for someone else to deal with. Distractions like a quest such as the one Jack had suggested were the reason why he was still in this future, and not in the past. It was an easy thing to take advantage of, as Aku knew firsthand.

And the samurai hadn’t even bothered to explain _why_ the “right” choice was the correct one. It wound up frustrating both of them until Jack had eventually cancelled the morality lesson, telling Aku he was “still making all the wrong choices.”

At least Aku was gaining more knowledge of the samurai’s different fighting styles. He knew the fool still kept many of the greater moves hidden, untrusting of Aku (as he should be, Aku would admit begrudgingly) but not enough to leave Aku…er. Defenseless. He adamantly refused to be thought of as “helpless.”

Aku was shaken from those thoughts at distant ringing of bells echoed from the road ahead, and Jack felt the anticipation start to stir in himself. This road was supposed to be off the maps, and unused by any major traffic anymore. He pushed aside his nervousness for the moment with the reassurance that it would likely be locals; they would know about the road, and would look to use it if traffic was too heavy elsewhere. He held tight to the distant thought of preparing for a fight, however, as he would not be caught off-guard no matter what.

As they came around the corner, at the furthest point of their sights came a series of carts and wagons, led by two weary-looking horses with a short, wrinkled woman holding the reigns.

Aku huffed as they pulled off to the side of the road, the muffled jingling of the bells growing steadily closer as the two parties passed each other. The caravan was nothing too extraordinary; the withered old woman at the front gave Aku and Jack cockeyed, piercing glares, and the rest of the members merely glanced offhandedly at them. Thick black sheets covered the contents of each cart, although they were worn and patchy from years of use. However, as they came upon the last two, both Aku and Jack felt a chill run down their spines, and they simultaneously froze to stare.

The sheet for the second to last one had been torn to pieces, leaving most of the cage under it exposed. Within the cage, a large creature stared hungrily through the bars at Aku and Jack. Even in the shadows, both could distinguish the deep brown feathered torso and wings, yet a terrifying female face sat upon the short neck. The single, gnarled branch it perched upon was gripped tightly under two deadly cruel talons; they flexed tauntingly as the caravan went by. The face grinned, revealing nightmarish teeth, as the steely gaze fell over Aku.

The last cage, thankfully empty, finally passed and they were both left standing there, horror finally seeping out of their bodies.

“What…was that?” Jack asked, his voice seeming far away even from his own throat.

Aku swallowed, eyes still wide, “That was the harpy, Celaeno. How she was captured like that, I do not care to know.”

They both shook off the lingering fear, and Aku gripped his hands tight around his shoulders as he turned and continued walking, still feeling that leer on him. Once they were some distance away, and the terror ebbed away, Jack found himself thinking about what a story this would make to tell his parents, and his people. He couldn’t help but let out a small smile at the thought, but it vanished when he heard Aku make a questioning hum.

“What was that?” Aku asked, pursing his lips.

“I was thinking,” Jack decided to explain, “Of how nobody back home will likely believe me when I tell them I saw such a legendary beast. But I have seen and done many things that will startle them.”

Aku’s heart beat erratically at the samurai’s implications, and he wanted to sour Jack’s mood in retaliation. It had always been one of the ways that would instantly cheer him up if the fool became too hopeful.

“You are right, they will not believe you,” Aku commented, raising his eyebrows in a haughty look.

Jack glanced at Aku, frowning, “What? Why do you think that?”

“Humans have always been superstitious and weak. I even doubt they will welcome you with open arms, in spite of…whatever success you bring back with you.” He chose his words carefully, but spoke confidently.

Jack’s eyes went wide, but a spark of fury was held in them.

“Do not speak of what you do not _know_ , Aku. I lived with my people, and they will not shut me out.”

“Then what did you think was going to happen when you arrived in your own time, eh?” Aku retorted, “That you would be accepted completely? Regarded as a hero, certainly, but _accepted_? No, samurai, I have ruled over your kind for too long to be as blind as you are. They will welcome your return and victory, but you still forever be a stranger. A man who was sent to a distant time, and has seen and experienced things none of them will in all their lifetimes, will be looked upon as an outsider— perhaps even suspicious if they are paranoid— and never seen as ‘one of them.’”

Aku’s words hit Jack deeply, and Jack tensed, wanting to jump in and tell him how wrong he was, how Jack knew his people would accept him and…and…

But that was the _worst_ part. He could not deny that Aku had a high chance of having spoken the truth. There would…never be anyone like him back home. No one who understood, truly, what he had seen, done, or been through.

The thought made his mood plummet, but he did not want to give Aku the satisfaction of knowing that. He wanted to show Aku that the ex-demon couldn’t get to him, now that he was effectively “out of the way” of Jack’s goals.

“Perhaps,” Jack mused, furrowing his brow, “But I have faith you are wrong. They will understand that I have indeed had different experiences, but they will celebrate my success regardless.”

Once again, the implication shot through Aku’s mind like a hornet, and he stiffened. It worsened when Jack let out a snort of laughter.

“Although, the part they will certainly not believe is this; you being _cursed_ to walk a mortal life.”

Aku shot up straight, crying out indignantly, “Fool! You have no need to make mention of…of this! This is merely a temporary fate! A fate I certainly did not deserve!”

Jack curled his hands a little tighter, but kept his emotions in check. He chose to respond with a more logical answer (and one that would likely poke further holes into Aku’s ego).

“Yes, well, perhaps ‘undeserved fate’ would not have happened if you had not angered so many, including whomever placed this magic upon you.”

“I would not have angered them if you and your kind would have accepted me as your lord and master.”

Jack twitched in irritation.

“I nor these people accept you because you are a tyrant!”

“Better a tyrant than the chaos or war your species would rule themselves in!” Aku snapped back, stopping to glare at Jack in full.

Jack halted in his tracks to step closer to Aku, feeling his temper beginning to flare despite his attempts at control.

“I know we are all basically good, even if we make mistakes! That is what the sword, the only weapon that can harm _you_ ,” Jack placed his hand over the weapon’s handle, smugly delighted when Aku’s eyes flickered to watch the movement, “Is made from. The good of _humanity_.”

“Believe what you wish, samurai!” Aku snorted, “Even when your species slaughters your neighbor’s children.”

“But you kill their parents!” Jack’s voice rose drastically, the surge of utter disgust at Aku’s opinions of himself overwhelming him.

“Only because they disobey my laws! Or otherwise attempt to hinder my rule, but I at least have the capacity of mercy to send them to the Pit of Hate as a chance to _live_ most of the time, despite what you claim!”

“That place is no better than death,” Jack retorted, feeling like he wanted to pull his own hair out, “Death might even be preferable to the tortures your sick mind comes up with!”

Of all things, Aku _grinned,_ and Jack felt like he might be sick.

“Well, I do try.”

Jack’s hands clenched into fists, the one still over the handle of his sword digging into the worn material. He closed his eyes, and then shook his head and began to turn away, not seeing the point in arguing with this monstrosity. His form may have been cursed to be human, but he was still the same demon. How Jack might have possibly hoped for anything else was now a ridiculous thought to him.

However, foolishly, he found himself speaking his mind before he could truly think of the consequences of what was being said; sadly, that appeared to be one of the demon’s influences upon Jack.

“My father should have killed you when he had the chance.”

Aku reeled back, gawking, pain blossoming in his chest mysteriously, but then grit his teeth and stepped forth into Jack’s personal space, making Jack spin to face him. Already Jack did not feel like he should have said that, even if he believed it, but he was not going to apologize.

“You want to talk about your father, eh?” Aku snarled, lips curling, “Shall we discuss the fact he _freed_ me, and then _attacked me_ when he saw the unsavory result of his hocus-pocus? He did not even give me a minute of life before he attempted to destroy me.”

“I _know_ this story, Aku,” Jack’s voice dropped low, “Because I also know the arrows had no effect, and then you went on to _destroy_ my home, ensuring my father was rendered helpless and forced to watch you burn it to the ground.”

“He was still the one that sought to destroy me first! I had to—”

“You had _no right!_ ” Jack finally began to yell, unable to hold his anger back, “The fact you still defend yourself over a single person’s useless assault as an excuse to slaughter hundreds, and then to later enslave the earth and slaughter _hundreds_ of thousands only proves you _are_ sheer evil, no matter what form you take or are cursed into! And I cannot face my ancestors with the knowledge I have helped a _creature_ like yourself!”

Jack turned and began to stride away, his heart pounding in his chest. He felt his decision on not striking Aku down wavering; the demon may be trapped in a mortal frame, but Jack could not continue to fail his mission by allowing the demon a chance to break this curse.

Before he made his decision, Aku shouted after him, causing Jack to freeze suddenly.

“What did you expect? That I naturally understand all your species’ complex morals and simply _choose_ to be your definition of evil? That perhaps, becoming human would give me insight and instantaneously cause me to become merciful and kind? Bah! I am indeed exactly what you said, fool, and I do not understand why you expect anything more from me!”

Jack had indeed known this, so why _had_ he expected more? That Aku would even _try_ to learn?

The sheer oddity of the idea caused Jack to exhale a humorous breath.

“I do not know,” he admitted without turning, “I think I might have hoped it would come to this, and I could end my pain that much more easily.”

“Pain?” Aku challenged, and Jack heard him step forward, “You want to talk about _pain_? Very well, samurai, let us compare scars!”

Jack fell eerily calm, and began to inch the sword out of its case.

“I have been immortal to time, mortal needs, and nearly all weapons since as far back as I can recall! I have always been able to feel strong anger, joy, and power, and they guided my every action and word! I thought mortals weak and useless on their own, and knowing that I was greater than them I chose to enforce that!”

Aku shook, and he clenched his eyes shut, inwardly cursing everything, even his own new self.

“Now? There are so many new and strange emotions, all at once, and it is driving me to madness because I cannot comprehend or even put a name to them! I suddenly feel needing to eat, to breathe, to survive! I can feel this body _dying_ all around me! My old memories of my true self are still there alongside this reality I have been forced into, and it is hindering my ability to grasp _anything_ now in spite of how sure I was that I understood how humans thought! I have conquered planets; killed and tortured millions; lived through eons and being locked away by that blasted sword; but this? I do not know how to deal with this! I do not know how y—”

Aku shut himself off with a deep breath, his chest feeling like it would collapse in on him any second. He felt like that damn blade had flayed open his chest, exposing everything underneath, and his hand went to feel where that awful heart was trying to escape out of his ribs again.

Jack had stood stock-still for well over a minute now, the realization only now just dawning on him of…of _everything_.

It had never occurred to him the sheer depths of what being changed into a mortal might mean for one such as Aku. The ex-demon had not given any real indications that these things plagued him so until now, but looking back, Jack could start to see a picture forming— all the small pieces of Aku’s quirks and subtle body language coming together now.

Suddenly, unbidden, his memories of being infected with Aku’s evil flashed: of feeling above everyone around him, and thus free from consequences; the complete lack of empathy that came with the high of suddenly being so much more powerful; the cold, soupy hatred that crept over him and restricted him to only finding joy from the misery of others—

He squeezed his eyes shut, shivering slightly in his gi. His eyes shot open immediately afterwards, as the _why_ it had come to him dawned.

He had been desperate to return to being mortal, because it was familiar and he couldn’t bear to be restricted to such destructive emotions. He had hated and feared that time, because Aku’s essence had tried to turn him into something he was not. Jack had fought tooth and nail to get his humanity back, but the thing was: he’d had the ability to do so on his own all along, despite the hardships.

This was not true for Aku.

When that finally clicked, Jack was able to see Aku’s fate through his own eyes.

It was _terrifying_.

Those thoughts left him feeling chilled, and he slowly put his sword back into its case. He took a deep breath through his nose, feeling it lift his shoulders, and then let it out. He rotated back to face Aku, watching the…man shake from both tension and release.

“I was…unaware that is how you felt. Why have you not said anything?” Jack’s expression bore his inner confusion and caution.

“Why should I?” Aku squinted angrily, “You still doubt everything I say.”

Jack’s mouth twitched at that, but it was only a reminder to himself of how he could have improved.

Patience, he was learning, was the key to dealing with Aku now.

“I am still adjusting to this too, though it is not even close to what you are going through, I imagine.”

Aku blinked at him, eyes wary.

“But do trust me in that I understand the pain of being forced into a fate you never asked for,” Jack said, and Aku looked away, “However, I believe this makes me a far better candidate for helping you with these first steps of being human.”

Without looking up, Aku asked after a terse silence: “Why are you doing this?”

Jack quirked an eyebrow, “We have a deal—”

“No,” Aku interrupted, curling in on himself, “ _Why?_ ”

Jack thought on how he would word it for a moment, and then let it out in a sighing breath.

“Because I think you can take this situation, and turn it into something beneficial; not for your tyranny, but for _yourself_. You say you do not understand all the inner workings and complex emotions of humans? _Take_ this chance to learn.”

Jack closed his eyes, and breathed out a tired sound of a laugh, “I do not doubt you will immediately go back to your old ways when or if you break this spell, so I may indeed be a fool for trying. But I have hope yet that you may see there is more to humanity, and all of our peculiar quirks, than what you have perceived before.”

It felt strange to have spoken so much in just the past half hour. Already Jack felt exhausted from the emotional rollercoaster; he wondered if Aku was confused by the same turmoil inside himself.

Aku let the samurai’s words sink in, and he _wanted_ to be angry, and mock the samurai for having such useless hope. But everything still hurt so much inside his chest from being so honest, and he just wanted to rest for the next hundred days. Truly horrifying! He’d been much more honest about himself the past few weeks than he had been in the past thousand years.

There were so many things he wanted to do that he couldn’t anymore, and as much as he hated to admit it the samurai had a point: Aku knew if he had revealed his name to most anyone else this side of the universe, he would have been dead on the spot. Jack was his best bet at surviving, and learning to deal with this cruel and unusual fate.

Aku would keep many things a secret from the samurai, knowing that they still held themselves as enemies, despite the hesitant alliance they made now, but he was also determined to live. And when their alliance came to its inevitable end, and they parted ways, Aku would be able to track down the break for this curse and use it, and then utilize the knowledge the samurai had given him to finally beat the fool.

In the meantime, though, he would have to make do.

Aku lifted his head, but wouldn’t look at Jack. He made a soft "tch" sound.

It was as good an answer as Jack would get for now.

**Author's Note:**

> TBC who you empathize with is up to you; i just provide the viewpoints i think they would have :P
> 
> for this and more interesting and awesome musings, i suggest [teacup's tags](http://teacupballerina.tumblr.com/tagged/aku-theories)
> 
> Shout out to my betaaaaa [Ka Won!!](http://iwalkandtalk.tumblr.com/)


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